Self pity is actually self absorption. We love to be focused on how we are the victim, and we deserve better.
We think about how unfair, unfortunate and undeserved our circumstances are.
We begin to feel justified in our bad mood because we’ve been so wrongly treated either by uncontrollable circumstances or other people (who are still out of our realm of control.)
In a weird way, we would prefer to be miserable than happy because it gives us a platform to focus on ourselves, our needs, our worries and complaints.
Fight the urge to enjoy your misery, It’s unproductive and detrimental.