A daughter sat complaining to her mother about an argument she was having with her father. When she asked if her mother would intervene and work out the situation for her, her mother said “Honey, that’s none of my business.” This seems harsh but in actuality it was a very wise decision. She would have done her daughter a disservice if she had gone and smoothed things over with her father. The mother could have created peace and resolved the issue, but the two players were the father and daughter. If someday the mother weren’t there, the two would never have learned to communicate or resolve their issues because their mediator was missing.
Oftentimes it is best to stay out of arguments that aren’t our own. We can give advice and counsel, but we should never do all the work to create peace. We start to enable those who are having the problems, and they begin to rely on us to fix them. Once that happens the tendency will be to get dragged into all the arguments and those we love will never learn to work through their own problems with each other.