Words from John Cusak

Say anything- one of the sweetest chick flicks from the 90’s. The character Lloyd’s older sister is slamming things around in the kitchen and Lloyd asks her “how hard is it to be happy? How hard is it to just decide to be happy”  The moment slips by and the movie continues, but that's actually a great question.

How hard is it to decide to be happy? To halt your negative thoughts and choose to dwell on what is good and lovely. How hard is it to change your mind and decide that you won't have a bad day just because it started out that way. Two people looking at the same circumstance can have very different emotions regarding it. Most often it’s a choice.

When someone pushes your buttons

The actions, tones and phrases people use that tick us off, are usually because of past experiences. It could be they uncovered an insecurity we have or harped on something others have said over the years. Whatever triggers the flare-up, we automatically think they intentionally provoked us. We choose to think that because, it’s easier to justify an outburst, if we were set up for it. But the truth is, most people don’t keep a notebook labeled “ways to make Bethany angry” They aren’t scheming to trip me up, and cause tension. (unless we’re talking about a little brother!)

But people blunder, they step on our proverbial toes, and unthinkingly annoy us. If we exercise self control, and avoid assigning wrong motives, we can allow ourselves to graciously move past the moment. This will save ourselves and others a lot of needless conflict.

What do you want to win at?

Chances are, you have a lot to juggle in life. You are busy and sometimes overwhelmed with all the different things you are trying to accomplish. You have so many goals and skills you would like to learn too. Wouldn’t it be great if you could be musical, a great cook, an impressive athlete, the perfect spouse, supermom, and the list goes on. There is good news and bad news. The bad news is that you can’t do everything, the good news is that you don’t have to.

A question I often ask myself is ‘what do you want to win at?”

What do you want to win at in life, this week, today, and at this moment. Whatever that is, that’s the priority. Focus on what you want to excel at, and pursue that. It won’t be everything. With this strategy we won’t be all-stars of life, but we will win, and we will win at what is most important.