Keep an open mind and heart

No conflict is ever isolated. All our past conflicts with that person, and our past experiences usually color our perception of that new disagreement. As we argue with our loved one, if in the past she’s been insensitive, we’ll automatically project that character flaw onto her. And it becomes a self fulfilling prophesy.  We become entrenched in our own thinking; convinced that she’ll act as before. Then because we convinced ourselves, even if her words aren’t glaringly insensitive, it’s still easier to attribute her words and actions to the motives we assigned her rather than giving her a fresh start and perhaps needing to change our mind.

It’s difficult to change our mind about someone, but past mistakes should not determine future conversations. We must give her the benefit of the doubt that she’ll handle this conversation differently than previous ones. If we keep an open mind and heart, this will allow space for understanding and resolution to the conflict.

Dress for Success

Its important that when interviewing or working somewhere, you dress just a step above everyone else. You should dress for the position you want, not the one you have. When you feel great and you look put together, you send that perception to those around you. People will make assumptions based on how you look. So what assumption do you want them to make? That you are sloppy, or careless? or that you are classy, and professional? Clothing says a lot about a person. Have your clothing reflect who you truly are.